Meat Loaf

1 lb ground meat (I used taco turkey meat)
½C quick-cooking oats
1 egg, slightly beaten
1 celery stick, chopped
8 baby carrots OR 2 carrots, grated
any seasonings you want (I went with garlic, chili powder, cayenne pepper, hot sauce and cinnamon)

Preheat oven to 350°F. Precook vegetables for soft texture, or leave as-is for crunchy. Line a shallow pan or cookie sheet with foil; spray foil with nonstick spray. Mix all ingredients; form into loaf and place in pan. Bake for 45 minutes. Enjoy.

Grilled Meat Loaf: All ingredients the same. Preheat George Foreman grill. Mix all ingredients; place on grill. Cook for 15 minutes. Enjoy.

( And now for something completely different. )

I went to the doctor for the first time since 1995, have this cyst-type-thing on my back that's bothering Pattie. (Doesn't bother me a bit, aside from occasionally itching. I've named it Bob.) Also got set up for a sleep study, since Pattie says I stop breathing during the night. BP was a tad high at the doc, he blamed it on the apnea. BP was closer to expected at the sleep center, they blamed the higher reading on nerves. And mom's pissed because the doctor didn't draw blood, I swear she's not happy if I'm not bleeding.

Celebrities have been dropping like flies lately. Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, Michael Jackson, and Billy Mays all within a week of each other. Makes you wonder who's next.

Finally a break in the heat, it's 72°F today. Still ready for winter, but this is much better.

I swear I'm the only person in this house who can manage not to piss on the damn toilet seat.

Last time I threw up without the aid of alcohol was, what, 2000, 2001, somewhere in there? And I couldn't tell you the last time I had the flu.

Well, today I had the flu.

Started out this morning at work with just a queasy stomach. Couldn't even go into the breakroom with whatever they were cooking -- had to have someone else get the trash -- and went outside (in -26°F wind chills) for fresh air at last break.

Off-subject a moment, about those temperatures. Had to break out my heavy Bengals coat, don't think I even wore it last year. Kept me plenty warm, but you remember the little kid on A Christmas Story that was so bundled up he could hardly move? Yeah, that's what it makes me feel like. Doesn't help that it's a 2X and these days I'm wearing 3X...

Anywho. So I held my stomach at bay until about a half-hour after I got home. Then I threw up everything in my stomach, threw up the bile in my stomach, tried to throw up my stomach, and threw up the water I was drinking, in that order. I was also cold, which doesn't happen.

By noon, though, the pyrotechnics died down, and some molasses water settled pretty good. Slept for a while, and I'll be good to go to work tonight. (Calling in would be stranger yet, haven't done that since 1997.)

Right now my stomach's gurgling a bit, but I think it's just lack of anything in it. We'll see how a plain grilled chicken breast does.

So iunno, I've just lost motivation to blog. Only reason I'm really doing it now is to put off calling my interviewer back -- I despise talking on the phone. Screw it, I'll call. Didn't get it, ah well. I got more dental swords, these ones have a flip-out point guard so Nate will be happy to know they don't reach far into the ear canal. Not that the waxy fortress has made any return anyways, I think irritation from the loud radio chatter and earpieces at OfficeMax had a lot to do with it. So I'm-a be married in a little under two months, and Pattie has come to the realization that momma and I were right about eloping. It'll still be a nice wedding, just much headacheness planning it. We're still on track, although we've still got some invitation stragglers to get addresses for and some groomsmen still need fitted for tuxes.

And I make fun of Pattie for not using carriage returns. Wow. I have to pee.

I am returned. So, Pirates of the Caribbean Online. For as good a speller as I am, I ALWAYS want two "R"s and one "B" in that word. Anyways. The limited free trial is nifty. I went ahead and did the $5 for the first month of unlimited, will know better in a few weeks if it's worth $10/mo after that. So far it's really fun, which surprises me because I normally hate the behind-the-character-3D crapola. Back in the day I think I tried to play Guild Wars for a whole week before I gave up in disgust. Leave it to Disney to finally get it right.

So our furnace is out again. The one nice thing about renting is that it's someone else's problem when stuff goes to pot. Which is ironic, because going to the pot is my only problem when the furnace goes out. I swear that toilet seat has a layer of dry ice on it.

Shill #2: Have I told you guys about NutraCal? Good stuff. I'm not personally worried about calcium deficiency -- I'd actually originally gotten it for Pattie, as it also boasts increased energy. Turns out Pattie can't handle it on the far end of her GI tract, but I've noticed it gives me more energy. Anyone who's interested can get a jar for $3.85, coupon code is CAL101. Without the period. That just denotes the end of the sentence.

I like green tea.

So I finally used up the last of that wretched toothpaste I had. The flavor wasn't bad, it was the packaging. It was a two-part toothpaste, but both parts were in one segmented tube. As you can guess, only one part ever came out at a time, and it got worse as I went up the tube. Technically there was still a little useable product in there, I just gave up on it. Good riddance.

If someone comes up to you and asks you to clean out the sink thigamajigger, are you going to figure out they wanted you to take the dishes out of the strainer, which is not in the sink? Yeah, me either. And that apparently makes me an asshole. Huh.

And I'm spent.

So I decided to change this thing up again. Went with the Plus account, which is free with ads. Incidentally, if you're seeing ads here or anywhere else, you're using the wrong browser. Go get Firefox, and the AdBlock and Filterset.G Updater extensions to go with it.

Pattie's gonna kill me for that icon. Ah well.

So Pattie and I joined the YMCA. The pool has handlebars underneath the diving platforms, pulling yourself up on them is a pretty decent workout, as is swimming in general. Maybe I'll finally burn off some gut.

Short one for now, get to go pick up Pattie from work and go swimmin'.

So, apparently Pattie wants to see me in boxers. She came up with an interesting reason that may or may not be way off base, but really, I just think the tighty whiteys don't do it for her. (Neither does her underwear, at least when I'm wearing it, but we've already gone over that.)

But, hey, underwear are cheap enough -- found a 4-pack for $6.99 at Value City. And I figured that since I wear a 2X in briefs, I'd also wear a 2X in boxers.

There are very few things in life about which I have been this wrong.

I suppose it's mostly a matter of briefs being stretchy and boxers being much more inelastic, but these things don't even pull up over my thighs. I'm assuming -- nay, I'm *praying* -- that opened underwear cannot be returned, so I now have a short-term fitness goal: to be able to get into a pair of 2X boxers.

For a while there, I was exercising a few times a week, which became once a week, which became once every few weeks, which became, well, never. So, hopefully this will get me back on track.

And now for something completely different -- the long-promised car update.

When we last left off, the big red beast had supposedly died, since fixing the breaks was to be more than the value of the car. The junkyard was going to give us $100 for it, but we had no idea what we were gonna do after that.

So, a few days later, mom picks me up at work, and along the way asks me what I thought of The Color Purple. I said it was a good book, but I hadn't seen the movie. I get the classic WTF look and then she says "No, for a car." Turns out someone just put out a purple 1996 Plymouth Neon for $600 -- which they dropped to $500 without us even asking (good thing too, because we were excited enough we didn't think to ask). And instead of junking the red beast, Jerry at work bought it as a fixer-upper, so at least someone's gonna get some more use out of it.

So Eric at work is prolly mad at me. They'd asked me to stay over (after my 10-hour shift) to help put away machines. I was considering it, when I go to the back to load up a cart and there he is, chatting away on a personal phone call. If he's got time for that, I figured he didn't need any help.

I was actually motivated enough to get a workout in before work this morning. I may burn off this blubber yet.

While neither is my favorite on its own, something about blond hair and brown eyes on the same person just makes me drool.